It's hard to be a Jew on Christmas.
My friends won't let me join in any games.
And I can't sing Christmas songs or decorate a Christmas tree

Or leave water out for Rudolph 'cuz there's something wrong with me.
My people don't believe in Jesus Christ's divinity!


I'm a Jew,
A lonely Jew
On Christmas.


Hanukkah is nice,
But why is it

That Santa passes over my house every year?

And instead of eating ham I have to eat kosher latkes;

Instead of Silent Night I'm singing Hoo Hact Toh Gaveesh;
And what the $#&@ is up with lighting all these $#&@ing candles please?


I'm a Jew,
A lonely Jew