Fat and weak, what a disgrace.
Guess the champ got too lazy.
Ain't gonna fly now, he's just takin' up space.

Sold his gloves, threw his eggs down the drain.

But he’s no bum, he works down the street

He bought the neighborhood deli.
Back on his feet, now he's choppin' up meat.
Come inside, maybe you'll hear him say,


Try the rye or the kaiser,
They're on special tonight.

If you want, you can have an appetizer
You might like our salami and the liver’s alright
And they'd really go well with the rye or the kaiser


Never eats while on the job,
He heard it’s good to stay hungry

But he makes a pretty mean shishkabob
Have a taste, they were made fresh today


Try the rye or the kaiser
Or the wheat or the white
Maybe I can suggest an appetizer

Stay away from the tuna, it smells funny tonight
But you just can’t go wrong with the rye or the kaiser


So today, his deli comes first
Still he dreams of his past days of glory
Goes in the back and beats up on the liverwurst

All the while you can still hear him say,

It’s the rye or the kaiser

It’s the thrill of one bite
Let me please be your catering advisor.
If you want substitutions,

I won't put up a fight.
You can have your roast beef on the rye or the kaiser.


The rye or the kaiser….. (repeat)