The valet pointed me through the door
One more shot and you're on the floor
If cash talks, yours is a lion's roar

Guesquire, Christian Dior
You're the $$#hole ambassador
But your friends obey like Labradors

I vomited on the alpine décor
It's okay, your daddy gon' buy some more


All your friends from school are here
Your frat boys got the rufies near
What will they want when you're out of beer?

Your parents' cocaine!
Your graduation monster bash
The maids will pick up all the trash

In almost every room is stashed
Your parents' cocaine!


Your daddy gon' make you VP of sales
Don't mix good %#@! with the ginger ale
Pacific Heights ain't Sunnydale

You could murder somebody and be out on bail
Your mom's Amtrak- she's on the rails
So many bumps thought it was Braille

One day, we're all gonna tip the scales
Cuz me and my crew are too big to fail


Steve and Katie shut the door
And $#&@ed all on the bathroom floor
Now they're up and looking for

Your parents' cocaine!
Until you get that trust fund check
Pretend you worked for your respect

Janie's asking if she can test
Your parents' cocaine!


All your esteemed colleages and guests
Are here to celebrate your success
They only say "Good Luck!" in jest

Your fortune guaranteed at the breast
And Dave, who let's you win at chess
Is with your girlfriend in her dress

They're tired of being your marionettes
You'll mourn in Rio via company jet


Your daddy's got a business plan
Which made wars in Afghanistan
It bought your house in Bangkok and

Your parents' cocaine!
Narcos kicked my windows out
They beat and dragged me out the house

They don't give a $#&@ about
Your parents' cocaine!