I gingerly handle the dead
To ensure a bruiseless corpse
I observe all methods of postmortem care

And standards as a matter of course
Most decedents are viewed open casket
So it behooves the pathologist to know

The techniques to use when handling deceased
So autopsy markings don't show


We charily follow the necropsy schedule
And behave as cautious prosectors
Corpses leave the morgue's custody

And enter the domain of the Funeral Director

All sutured incisions should be sharp and clean

And under burial attire, must remain unseen
When positioning the carcass on its anterior side
Prevent facial bruising, so difficult to hide


During cranial examination, reflect the scalp past the hairline at your own risk
You might leave creases in the forehead that the embalmer can't efface

Upon removal of the brain, before the notched calvarium is replaced
Fill the cavity with absorbent material to hold the cranial shape


Remove the testes
Through the inguinal c!@#^
Because posterior perforations

Allow embalming fluid out

Pathology becomes an art

When dead are opened with nominal marks
Embalmers welcome my proficiency
And morticians value my scrutiny


Carotid neck organs left intact
Iliac arteries promptly ligatured

The stiff is deftly rendered leak proof
With a Y-incision running suture


Organs are restored to the body in a plastic bag
The breastplate returned to reduce chest sag
Rinsing the corpse with cold water, we purify

Then allow the body to drip clean and air dry

Refrigerated to stave off the ravaging putrefactive progressive skin changes

Dusky hands rest on abdomens as tied gauze strips cinch slack arms into place
The hearse-delivered corpse is signed over to local funeral director representatives
Where, at the parlor, they'll lay the rotting head on a perfumed casket pillowcase


Remove the !@(!
Far from the !@#*

Lest embalming fluid leak
From a rectal stump unligated


Funeral home $$#istants haunt hospital ba!@&(t alleys
For sundered anatomized cadaveric deliveries
Piled into hearses, to the chagrin of watching nurses,

The enshrouded carcass reeks most unsavorily

Carcass sealed expertly

Undue holes mitigated
Stench increasingly redolent
As fluids are aspirated


Beyond the toe-tagged feet
Beneath the blood drenched sheets

Inside the cavities sewn
The morgue's marriage with the funeral home