Artois

Look mate I aint the fighting type

But I've had nine Stella's so I'm likely to strike
So please walk away before it gets too messy
And we end up in a cell or a cracked jaw on our settee


Artois why do you have to do that
The second you're consumed I'm a loon and I knew that

Artois how do u get me in that mode
I could have left trouble alone if I was sipping on a krone
Artois why do u have to be the cheapest

And surely that should mean that you should be the weakest
Artois
Artois, Artois, Artois


My plan was to get myself a class tart
Instead I'm down A and E due too Artois

Haha I've only got myself to blame
But its two pound for a Stella and that's all I had in change
So it only costs a tenna for a night on the Stella's with the fella's

But it means one of us will get leathered
Or nicked, shift passed out in our piss
But $#&@ it we love it ?here mate lend us a quid??


Artois why do you have to do that
The second you're consumed I'm a loon and I knew that

Artois why do u have to be the cheapest
And surely that should mean that you should be the weakest
Artois why do you have to do that

The second you're consumed I'm a loon and I knew that
Artois why do u have to be the cheapest
And surely that should mean that you should be the weakest

Artois

What the $#&@ are you looking at?

Come here go on!

Eight pints now I'm ready for a hard spar

And I swear I'm getting a funny look of that fella in the carhartt
Oi! Oi! don't make me take this to the car park
I'll beat you to a pulp then open you up like a mars bar

So think on I only came here for a sing song
But my mood shifted now my fifteenth drinks gone
So $#&@ it! Let's ruck it!

COME ON THEN! ?Oi here mate pass me a bucket
Where the $#&@ am I??


I didn't mean to get so pissed and feel a need to swing my fists
But I was stelled up I was stelled up
I really didn't mean to punch that bouncer in the mouth

But I was stelled up I was stelled up
I never planned this to happen, leaving town in a wagon
But I was stelled up I was stelled up

I never meant to tell that fed id wrap a bottle around his head
But I was stelled up I was stelled up


Artoi why do you have to do that
Because of you I've only got four knuckles left and a bruised back
Artoi why do u have to be the cheapest

And surely that should mean that you should be the weakest
Artois why do you have to do that
The second you're consumed I'm a loon and I knew that

Artois why do u have to be the cheapest
And surely that should mean that you should be the weakest
Artois