awesome, awesome, awesome,awesome,awesome,awesome
i don't necessarily have to be here for this
im gonna keep the headphones though

mother ******

[chorus]

I'm awesome!!!
no you're not dude don't lie
I'm awesome!!!

i'm drivin around in my mom's ride
I'm awesome!!!
a quarter of my life gone by and

i met all my friends online
mother $#&@er I'm awesome!!!
i will run away from a brawl

I'm awesome!!!
there's no voice mail nobody called
I'm awesome!!!

i can't afford to buy eight balls
and i talk to myself
on my facebook wall


you know my pants sag low (low)
even though (though) that went out of style

like ten years ago (go)
spose, i got the swagger of a cripple
i got little biceps,

getting fatter in the middle

and lyrically i'm not the best

physically the opposite of randy
moss and yet so preposterous
feel the awesomeness the most obnoxious

guest up at the sausage fest
oh yes!
the girls are repulsed so i hide

in my hood like i'm joining a cult
uh uhh
i'm as nervous as my cattle dirty curtis

all my writtens are bitten and
all my verses are purchased
me? i'ii never date an actress

got too many back zits
plus my home aroma is cat piss
every show i do is poorly

promoted and if you like this
it's cuz my little sister wrote it


[chorus]

swagger of a cripple


check it out


i'm from Maine and i don't hunt nope
and i can't ski
smoke weed but i can't roll blunts

maight be with my wifey
my necks not icy
eatin' at Mcdonalds because subway is pricey


uh and my unibrow is plucked
just ask my mom if i could borrow ten bucks

shes like ?for what?
blunt wraps and some heinekens?
you skinny prick, go get a gym membership and vitamins?

i'm like mom please don't blame it on me
i got my bad habits from
you, dad, and aunt steve

my attitudes sour but my futon's sweet
and the hair on my $$# it is jumanji


suit untailored, ringtone taylor swift
can't tweet up on my twitter
cuz i haven't done %#@!

blank account red, body ungroomed
the good thing about me is i'm off stage soon

[chorus]


further more i'm cornier than ethynol
cheesier than provolone
i spent years eight to ten living in a motor home
with a ego the size of Tim Duncan
even though i got %#@! for brains like a blumpkin

i'm twenty four serving lobster rolls
because i spent a decade filling
optimus and i'm not even the bomb in maine
on my game and only about as sexy as John Mccain.
Now put your hands up if you have nightmares.

If you wouldn't man up.
If there was a fight here.
If you got dandruff.
If you drink light beer.


Im outta breath!!!!

But,
[chorus]

I'm awesome !!!!!!!