you say you tried to raise me right, the best way that you could
you tried to keep me in sunday school and stay livin in a good neighborhood
you wanted me to be somethin, that no one else had ever seen

your ashamed of me now, but for once I am finally persuing my dream
I gave up on this god that they showed me cause nothing could prove he exists
and the pain in my life didn't stray when I preyed as I cry to the sky it persists

I've faced tragedy every god damned day since a fetus that was cradled by the woom
I face tragedy and I am sure it's here to stay, so I sit sobbing underneath the moon


Jesus Christ became an enemy to me,
I didn't understand what preachers wanted me to see
they spoke half $$#ed, they're facts were never clear

they talked as if this booklet should eliminate my fear
they said to have faith, and not care how it worked
but I strive to learn more, so I won't sit here in the dirt

crying and begging every night, my knuckles are turning white
shaking yelling at the sky "why won't you just let me die?!"
never heard a damn response, all I asked for was a sign

finally a learned this beam of light was yours but wasn't mine
I'm on my own path, i'll do what I see fit
I'm still living in %#@!, but the universe keeps me breathin'

so to my parents that i'm nothing but a failure to
sorry that i break your hearts, sorry that i've failed you
sorry that you think my future holds no sort of clarity

maybe if you understood my mind you wont be scared of me

let me make this very clear, so I can get it off my chest

for too long has it been making me obsessed
I know that the life I live has never been the best
I see that I'm confused, too soon I left the nest

but I see when a humans fear is given too much power
guilt lasted for years, cursing myself for hours
I am not another droid, I am but a flower

freshly planted in the soil, soon enough i'll tower
pain is all i've seen, and horrid loss is all i've gained
sickness is what's seaped inside the music in my brain

thats why when you hear these words I sound a bit insane
it's real as you hear it, this side of me isn't fake
unwillingly held down, by thought I'd go to hell

for thinking human these thoughts, or cursing when I had fell
little did I know, I've been placed there already
I've seen nothing but tears, so tell your devil come and get me


they don't really care, there is no one when I'm scared at all
there's no one there, when this life just isn't fair at all

they don't really care, when I'm weak and I can barely crawl
there's no one there, when I'm burned and stripped bare I fall