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Redeemer lyrics : "Sorrow and Regret"

Family meant everything before my family was gone
and I thought I could push through, but I could only stay so strong
She was beautiful as ever, even screaming as she left

but when she went she took the children and I haven't seen them since
Innocent and perfect, they were everything I had
but I don't deserve a family and I can't outrun my past

so I stayed sober for a year and drank the other five away
because the whiskey feels like comfort and the bottle always stays
When i'm drunk I don't feel anything which feels alot like peace

It keeps my finger off the trigger but the steel between my teeth
Barkeep the bottle, I'll drink to misery
Deadbeat; forgotten, not the man that I used to be

Why hope for tomorrow? I can drown myself today
I was once a father. We were once a family
No home, no reason to live and no hope

I'm back to the poison that made her go
Two days from now, six years ago, I can't forget
Who cares if I make it home?

Fifth of Jack for a lonely ride
I never even saw the sign
God, what have I done?

I was dead before I took their lives
They aren't breathing
Young girl and her child son

I couldn't save them
But how could I run?
Somebody's family, somebody's wife, somebody's child, I've ruined someone's life

It's bad enough i've taken everything I had
How could I kill and drive on past? (What a coward I am)
I would give anything to put that bottle down

I would give anything, for everything i've lost somehow
I'm so sorry, I could never fix my mistakes
I beg forgiveness now, I wouldn't expect acceptance

I'm alive somehow. I would not blame them if they end it
I've ruined lives and pushed everyone that I loved to the side
I've been destroyed by my vices

These addictions have prices
I could never say enough
Can't right all the wrong i've done

I've left bodies in my wake
I'm so sorry

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