Paranoid, trapped in a zone i see monsters looking at me but i feel all alone Its like, ive learnt to understand the world in different ways, and it plays on my brain for days and for days, and i, just sit there wondering and wondering, thinking to myself these emotions keep me struggling, keep me broken, and it hurts, what happens when you've loved a girl for so long its lost its worth, See you can put it all on being so young, elders have lost so many so they try to keep you strong and your just sitting there knowing, there kinda wrong that know matter how many fish there are you want that one, so i spark up, take a hit of that bong sitting back i pick all the things i did wrong, things that shouldn't of happened i question would the spark be there but the fear of loss is painful so ive learnt how not to care

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All these years, looking back, does no good, its a fact, and then i snap! back to reality weed makes the good great but the bad insanity, and its self vanity i put up as a wall, knowing if i shared emotions that wall would surely fall, and its the reason why i find it hard to love, its the few girls that push you when your trying to stand up, the same ones that shove you when they want you to feel down, see i felt like i am just running round and round so confused and afraid so i push it out my mind, its like you cannot see the evil if your walking around blind so i do that, its why i never call you back its my self confidence past that night that i lack, the will to share emotions and to share them back, ive been hurt too much and im never going back!


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Theres been so many but three ive loved the most, one i lost my brother for the others on a coast with her new man i miss that kiss the most that is true fam and finally the last who was the first in my big plan, to settle down, and open up, but now i cant love someone i cannot trust or maybe i cant live with the fact she wasn't there, that's why i thank my brothers the only ones i know who care and that's why i cant do it, to her its too unfair, to be or not to be is the question everywhere, im content with my life i just couldn't ignore that flare, that flame, the one too which any man is rare, so what happens now, is the next question on my list, until that creature goes away and i finally get my wish , until then until i finally see the day, il sit write some bars smoke some bud and il say