ladies and gentlemen
welcome to the disclaimer
that's right the disclaimer


this american apple pie institution
known as parental discretion

will cleanse any sense of innuendo or sarcasm
from the lyrics that might actually make you think
and will also insult your intelligence at the same time


so protect your family
this album contains explicit depictions

of things which are real
these real things are commonly known as life
so if it sounds sarcastic don't take it seriously

if it sounds dangerous
do not try this at home or at all
and if it offends you just don't listen to it