When I was 21
I thought I was Jesus
It was the LSD talking

But you know I believed it
I wasn't a devout man
Yet that didn't keep me

From trying to heal a homeless clan
with my hands
on Charleston's upper King Street


27 hits later
The puzzle pieces came together

In my mind
I knew I'd have to die to be the savior
Folly Beach set the scene

Five thirty in the a.m.
Finished waitin', mind racin'
Time to do what I came for


I dove in, hit the ocean
All alone, no flotation

My plan, to get tired and die
for my eternal mission
to rescue the world

From conflict hate and murder
To usher in peace
and God's eternal kingdom order

You see, the drugs are quick
And deception runs deep
All day swimmin', head spinnin'

Couldn't see what was happenin' to me

When I finally came to

there was only blue all around
I was naked tired and knew
I had to get back on solid ground

Not being Jesus left me in a tight spot
Cause suddenly I had no eternal purpose
to justify my suicide plot

Just a kid with a head full of drugs
Gonna die a senseless death
like so many others

parents asking, 'why?'

Just another number

a statistic for the books
A product of this hedonistic culture
that looks its young people in the face

and denies all traces Of meaning and purpose
claiming that slime and time and chance
is how life on earth was made


My head raced knowin'
I was headed for the grave

That my fate would be the same
as the icons of my age
Hendrix, Farley, Joplin, Marley,

Whitney Houston, Kurt Cobain
Rising stars, fallen hard
taken well before their day


Now I too would go their way
One more nameless face

fallen victim to the lie
that life means nothing
We're all gonna die

And rot in the ground
Fade out without a sound
into eternal nothingness

With no meaning
and no profound purpose
like a merry go round at the circus


Yet as I stood on the brink of death's door
I knew in my heart

there had to be more
That death is not the end
but a corridor that begins
an eternal reality
that we were all designed for


And if heaven is for real
then hell must be too
And people like me don't get shoed in,
a shroom kid, pot smokin',

hippie toker, acid dropper, pill popper
with a messiah complex, no less,
tryin' to end his life, all a mess

No, I knew my fate was bleak

And that I couldn't rest on
the squeaky clean image
I hid behind as a child
I was finally exposed
a fraud and a poser

crook, liar, thief, cheater, player
the list goes on and

All I knew was
I was about to drown
so I swam with all my might

in hopes of touching down on solid ground
hopin' that this fight wasn't over yet
just one more round
Please it can't end now
there must still be a chance
of getting back to land safe and sound


I'm not dead
it's not too late
Maybe I can escape
Meeting this awful fate
the fruit of what I'd sown
livin' for years with deaf ears
lookin' out only for my own pleasure

I knew I deserved this death in full measure
Still I longed for redemption despite
my situation's bleak nature

Then the sun set
Smashing my hope all to bits
Knowin' in my heart that I had been licked

Game over, time to quit,
Sink down into the pit
of nothingness

Yet one final thought crept into my mind
And I prayed to God
for the first time in years

last try at salvation
by his hand, not mine
A plea for mercy thrown to the sky
I prayed a simple prayer
Lord, if only you would spare my fleeting life
I would never dare to drink or drug again
as long as I'm alive


The ground didn't quake
and nothing monumental occurred
aside from some birds flying overhead
and a whispered word
I love you

God heeded my prayer
and after 18 hours out there at sea
I swam ashore at a place fittingly called
The Sanctuary

Now 18 hours is a tall order
Particularly considering
That I'm not much of a swimmer
Plus night before
didn't get any sleep
Trippin' hard, no food, nothing to drink
How I survived is no mystery
The miracle man is plain to see

Now ashore at Kiawah's beach
seven miles from the inlet breach
where I began my epic swim
Jumped in at Folly
and landed by a whim
at a five star resort on Kiawah Island
The Sanctuary
Too insane to be chance
This can only be
the work of God's hand

Fast forward four days more,
I left through hospital doors
20 pounds lighter
Than my fighting weight
before I began on this marathon ocean tour

Now seven years later, still sober
Hangin' with the man with the holes in his hands
the real Jesus
Livin' not for me, but for his glory
And although it seems stranger than fiction
This is my true story