Lookin' at you with your seven toes
Always there when I'm tastin' the woes
Your %#@! stinks worse than the rest

But my honey, I think you're the best
You are the best, oh, oh, oh, you are the best
Catchin' flies like no #~!!@ can

you're more faithful than any man
So soft & sweet & beautiful
I never ever wanna let you go

And you're never dell. No! No! No!
you're never dell
'Cause you're my friend, Edgar

My friendly friend, Edgar
My feline friend, Edgar
My friendly friend, Edgar

you're named after that Poe dude
Love a spankin' if you're in the mood
So soft and sweet and cuddly

Baby, baby make me wanna sing
And I think you're the best!
Yes, yes, yes!

I think you're the best
Stand by me through thick & thin
Cryin' at the door I'll let you in

Lookin' at you with your loving eyes
So young but you seem so wise
Eatin' food before Miso can

Chewin' plastic on the garbage can
Love a nip when you wanna get high
Piss in the shower cause you're so fly!

My friendly friend, my feline friend...