If it wasn't for the beans
That come out the can
Or the peas and beets

To ripen
The milk and bread
At the grocery store

I couldn't eat no more
Let me tell my wife
(his wife, she can't cook)


Lord, if i thought she could read
I would buy her a book

But all she knows how to do
Is fuss and holler
She don't even know

How to boil water

Let me tell ya what we had last night

On the dinner table
A tomato
The nastiest stuff you ever wanna see

And she was tryin' to feed it to me

Let me tell ya

I think that woman is downright
'cause here the sister
With coldcuts and gravy

Now coldcuts and gravy in a
I thought i'd choke but i got through
Well she said

(spit it out, spit it out)
What you say? woo hoo
Oh but i guess i'm gonna eat this slop

Any old way

So don't you get me wrong

I love that girl
I guess i'm about craziest old man in the world
But i got to love her

'cause i got no friends
Aww, here she comes
With red beans and onions again

And she say...

What you say?

Ohh, woo hoo
One two three four
Five six seven eight

Nine eight seven six
Five four three two
One more time, come on


Early in the mornin'
Woah, hoo

(his wife, she can't cook)
Cook them beans, cook 'em clean
Put 'em in a pot and let 'em stink, come on

(his wife, she can't cook)
What you say?
Woahh, wooo


Come to the doctor
You wonder why

I just ate them beans
And i'm about to die, come on


Hey baby
(his wife, she can't cook)
Ohhh, wooo hoo

(his wife, she can't cook)
Aww, just a little bit louder, come on