Yo, it's me, your man Jay C.
You'll find me at the mall in the CBD,
sittin' on a pillow, lighting up a durry,

shouting clever %#@! at people in a hurry.

Sit and talk while you walk,

hear the bogan mumma's squawk.
We all flock, there's a jock but he can suck my @@#!!
There's a clock, throw a rock,

Holy %#@!! That thing can talk!

You know who I am, it's your brother H-biddy.

Every night in a %#@!ty club or pub in the city.
Lloyds, Alchemy, Oak and New York.
Go to Morties and steal a knife and fork.


Drink some goon, drink some gin, go and vomit in a bin.
Come on mate! Punch me! I'll take it on the chin!

Find a girl, have a whirl, forgot a condom.
End the night with a fight at Pizzakom.


Hey guys and girls, my name's Big Willy.
Launceston's bad? Well that's just silly!
We got a park with a train, monkeys and a duck.

Come to these toilets if you want to f*ck!

Launnie's a hole? Burger got soul!

And other places...
... Like...
McDonalds.


[CHORUS]


[DANCE BREAK]

When I got nothin' to do I get high at the skate park.

When people pass me doing blockies I'm like oh fark!
Walking through the town I hear distasteful remarks!
But watch out for rapists in the city when it's dark!


Ravenswood, Riverside, Newstead, Mowbray,
Norwood, Trevallyn, Prospect, Invermay.


When you need to get around there's a free tiger bus,
Oh a beer bottle! That's a plus!

You won't find a building higher than this six storey Myer,
Walking through the mall I don't want your $#&@ing flyer!


But seriously guys it's a really nice place.
Say that again and I'll punch you in the face!
At the end of the day I look at the skies above,

And I realise Launceston's a place that I love.

[CHORUS]