(Verse)
It was on all Hallows eve
She came out just to meet me

We would go trick or treating
And load up on free candy!
I was a blanket ghost

She came dressed like the walking dead
She grunted and she moaned
We weren't even in bed


Then it occurred to me
This might be more than Halloween

She came in for the kiss
A haunting stench came off her lips
The maggots in her head

Were more than makeup and effects
She reeked of blood and death
That's when I realized


(Chorus)
Holy %#@!! You're a zombie!

You're a zombie! And you want a piece of
ME! I should've known right from the start.
I should've known you only loved me for my brain!


(Verse 2)
So let's try this again

You showed up in the dead of night
They said you were something else
And she will ruin your life

You're getting kind of rough
I didn't you know you had this side
Everyone said that you bite

But much to my surprise

(Chorus 2)

What the $#&@?! You're a vampire!
You're a vampire! And you want to suck me...
Dry! I wanted to get lucky tonight

But this is not what I had in mind

(Bridge)

They say the third times a charm
And she could do you know harm
You were big, you were green, you looked all kinds of mean

There were rods in your neck but they weren't plastic
Your face was all scarred up, it was all sorts of $#&@ed
I was terrified because I realized


(Chorus 3)
Oh my god! You're butt ugly!

Butt $#&@ing ugly! And you weren't wearing a
Mask! And you look just like Frankenstein's wife
Please be gentle this is my first time


(Outro)
The trick's on me! (x8)