Philosophers and poets, and songwriters too,
Have told stories through the ages,

'Bout what friends can do to you.
Their envy and betrayal,
can drive a man to drink,

Or land a man in jail
That is why I think......


All My Best Friends, Are Behind Bars,
Sometimes we take things a bit to far,
Oh but, I don't mean they're bad men,

Please don't take it wrong when, (I say),
All My Best Friends, Are Behind Bars


I spent the better part of my adult life,
Fightin' with best friends and arguin' with wives,
And tryin' to convince some judge I'm just misunderstood.

Then a bartender showed me the secret to life,
Is a smooth sippin' whiskey and a handful of ice,
Since then its all been downhill...yeah...life is good.


(Chorus)


Jim and Jack help me through hard times,
Me and Jose party till sunrise,
Johnny Walker helps me walk the line,


(Chorus)