Abraham Lincoln was a friend of mine
He used to sleep on my couch
When he dropped a dumbbell on my foot

I tried hard not to say ouch
He was pretty gnarly
I didn't want to seem soft

He had a charm like an octopus
And he'd never turn it off


Abraham Lincoln didn't have a job
He meditated everyday
He always knew what I was thinking

And what I was about to say
He never washed his clothes
Beetles lived in his beard

I'd take him to Thanksgiving
And my family thought he was weird


Abraham Lincoln danced like Michael
And sang like HG Welles
He loved to eat fried dough and cast

Warlock spelly spells
Nothing phased old honest Abe
And I miss him all the time

He used to sleep on my couch
Abe was a friend of mine