Things don't look to good to me
I feel I'm out of luck
And all because of swollen glands

And just one stupid $#&@

This whacko came from Alabammy

That's not where it's at
And now your jock's been chasing me 'round
With a great big baseball bat


Don't kick my $$#
Don't kick my $$#

Don't kick my $$# with a baseball bat, no

Don't kick my $$#

Don't kick my $$#
Don't kick my $$# with a baseball bat, no


Well I was in the mood for some lovin' bulk
Not a wrassling match with a some big hulk
And this here dude, he was an uncool cat

And he beat me by my head with a baseball bat

Don't kick my $$#

Don't kick my $$#
Don't kick my $$# with a baseball bat, no


Don't kick my $$#
Don't kick my $$#
Don't kick my $$# with a baseball bat, no


Don't kick my $$#
Don't kick my $$#

Don't kick my $$# with a baseball bat, no

Don't kick my $$#

Don't kick my $$#
Don't kick my $$# with a baseball bat, no


When I got up from being beat to the ground
I started itchin' around like a blue-tick hound
And I was aghast at what I found

The latest social disease that's been going around

I'll kick your $$#

(I'll kick your $$#)
I'll kick your $$#
(I'll kick your $$#)

I'll kick your $$# with a baseball bat, (*##$

I'll kick your $$#

(I'll kick your $$#)
I'll kick your $$#
(I'll kick your $$#)

I'll kick your $$# with a baseball bat, (*##$

I'll kick your $$#

(I'll kick your $$#)
I'll kick your $$#
(I'll kick your $$#)

I'll kick your $$# with a baseball bat, (*##$

I'll kick your $$#

(I'll kick your $$#)
I'll kick your $$#
(I'll kick your $$#)

I'll kick your $$# with a baseball bat, (*##$