I've always said "I do" too easy
And now I'm payin' the price
My weakness for beautiful women

Is my most expensive vice
I still believe in matrimony
But I can't afford another try

Child support and alimony
Is just about to bleed me dry


[Chorus:]
I got ex's all across the country
And I owe everybody in town

I got bill collectors a callin' me up
And lawyers tryin' to track me down
I'm just one wrong move from the poor house

But I don't belong in there
I got so many ex's and owe so much
I ought to be on Hollywood squares


Yeah, I ought to be on Hollywood squares


Lookin' back over my love life
I only have myself to blame
I guess I should've checked my price tag

Before I gave 'em my last name
Now my credit rating's in the gutter
And the bottom line sure looks bad

I'll be payin' the rest of my life
For the few good times I've had


[Chorus]

Yeah, they ought to put me on Hollywood squares