Fat and weak what a disgrace
Guess the champ got too lazy
Ain't gonna fly now he's just takin' up space

Sold his gloves threw his eggs down the drain

But he's no bum he works down the street

He bought the neighborhood deli
Back on his feet now he's choppin' up meat
Come inside maybe you'll hear him say


Try the rye or the kaiser
They're on special tonight

If you want you can have an appetizer
You might like our silami and the liver's alright
And they really go well with the rye or the kaiser


Never eats while on the job
He heard it's good to stay hungry

But he makes a pretty mean shishkabob
Have a taste they were made fresh today


Try the rye or the kaiser
Or the wheat or the white
Maybe i can suggest an appetizer

Stay away from the tuna it smells funny tonight
But you just can't go wrong with the rye or the kaiser


So today his deli comes first
Steady dreams of his past days of glory
Goes to the back and beats on the liverwurst

All the while you can still hear him say

It's the rye or the kaiser

It's the thrill of one bite
Let me please be your catering advisor
If you want substitutions

I won't put up a fight
You can have your roast beef on the rye or the kaiser


The rye or the kaiser
The rye or the kaiser