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FRANK ZAPPA lyrics : "Xmas Values"

Spider: I think I can explain about about how the pigs' music works
Monica: Well, this should be interesting
Spider: Remember that they make music with a very dense light

John: Yeah
Monica: O.K.
Spider: And remember about the smoke standing still and how they they really get

uptight when you try to move the smoke, right?
Monica: Right
John: Yeah?

Spider: I think the music in that dense light is probably what makes the smoke
stand still. As soon as the pony's mane starts to get good in the back any sort
of motion, especially of smoke or gas, begins to make the ends split

Monica: Well don't the splitting ends change the density of the ponies' music so
it affects the density of the pigs' music, which makes the smoke move which
upsets the pigs?

Spider: No, it isn't like that
John: Well, how does it work?
Spider: Well, what it does is when it strikes any sort of energy field or solid

object or even something as ephemeral as smoke, the first thing it does is
begins to inactivate the molecular motion so that it slows down and finally
stops. That's why the smoke stops. And also have you ever noticed how the the

smoke clouds shrink up? That's because the molecules come closer together. The
cold light makes it get so small, this is really brittle smoke
John: And that's why the pigs don't want you to touch it

Spider: See, when the smoke gets that brittle what happens when you try to move
it is it disintegrates
John: And the pigs get uptight 'cause you know they, they worship that smoke.

They salute it every day
Monica: You know we've got something here
John: And, and, and, and that's the basis of all their nationalism. Like if they

can't salute the smoke every morning when they get up . . .
Spider: Yeah, it's a vicious circle. You got it

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