My suspicions were alerted by a little bit of flirting
My beady eye caught it at a gig
Sally is my lover and he's the dogdrummer

I love them both but can i forgive
No, no, a double betrayal
Is something that i cannot forget

She thinks i'm all cool standing here on the stage
But between the sheets useless and inept


[chorus:]
Wakey no, wakey no, wakey no!
Burn, burn, burn, burn


She looked pretty nice as i went to spend the night
Working on the graveyard shift

Feeling pretty tense i hid behind a fence
Dogdrummer arrived and they kissed
Just imagine what it's like with a length of steel pipe

As me size tens booted down the door
There, before me, naked and ^^&$#*
They were shagging like rabbits on the floor


Without hesitation i trussed 'em to the bed
With several lengths of baler twine

I was kind of in a dream as i poured the gasoline
On dogdrummer and that f**king $%&^x of mine
Now i am the judge and your punishments stern

I sentence you both to burn
Thou is a $%&^x and thee is a liar
Now roast on a porky human pyre

And the moral of this story is...
Don't f**k another mans wife!