Raised to be a lady by the golden rule
Alice was the spawn of a public school
With a double barrel name in the back of her brain

And a simple case of Mummy-doesn't-love-me blues

Reality it seems was just a dream

She couldn't get it on with the boys on the scene
But what do you expect from a chick who's just sixteen
And hey, hey, hey, you know what I mean


All the young girls love Alice
Tender young Alice they say

Come over and see me
Come over and please me
Alice it's my turn today


All the young girls love Alice
Tender young Alice they say

If I give you my number
Will you promise to call me
Wait till my husband's away


Poor little darling with a chip out of her heart
It's like acting in a movie when you got the wrong part

Getting your kicks in another girl's bed
And it was only last Tuesday they found you in the subway dead


And who could you call your friends down in Soho
One or two middle-aged !@()s in a Go-Go
And what do you expect from a sixteen year old yo-yo

And hey, hey, hey, oh don't you know