oh, to have a pristine claw
these hands are old and sore
the knuckles they ache, the bones they do break

oh, to have a youthful frown
bleed on the surgeon's gown
put plastic in me, i'm perfect you see


don't look older than 43
but really i'm 70

now run young man and get my pills from the pharmacy
rearrange my face for a hefty fee
i can't change the inside of me

i'm a vampire of the 21st century

oh, to have a pristine claw

marry the doctor when i'm poor
a face i can love, a cut that's above
if the aliens landed here

they'd see why we're so weird
we're destined to die, we're destined to die


don't look older than 43
but really i'm 70
now run young man and get my pills from the pharmacy

rearrange my face for a hefty fee
i can't change the inside of me
i'm a vampire of the 21st century


that's me, that's me, that's me, that's me...