Crhis Kringle:
Hey I'm Santa Claus,
I'm the king of snow

I hate my wife because
She is ho ho ho
She used to please me everyday

Then she made it clear
That Santa's only s'pose to### once year
(*##$

Now I buy !@^%s
Rock n roll
And I stuff their stockings

With my north pole

Patrick O'Reily:

I had a wonderful life
With a healthy household
And a beautiful wife

And a pot full of gold
Then my wife spent my riches all by herself
And since women are (*##$es, blew a keebler elf

Now I drink all day
And a part of me dies
Cause my wife's gettin gangbanged

By the rice krispie guys

Tony the tiger:

Everyday I get up, and I get to work late,
My boss says "hey what'sup?"
I say I'm grrrrrrowing tired of this %#@!

The kids they laugh cause I'm a sensitive cat
"big #~!!@!" I can't argue with that
If another kid gives me frosted flakes

I swear on my life, I'll eat his parents.

Easter bunny:

I'm the easter bunny hey I'm back
Used to funny now I'm hooked on crack
Heaps of !@(%e aint no joke

Marshmallow peeps, covered in !@%!e !@%!e !@%!e !@%!e
Coooooke
Drugs for life that's my plan

But now I have no attention sp?...



Hey pat did you hear? all my elves got sick
I think they got herpes from some irish chick


Patrick O'reily
Santa, tony, could you guys please stop?


Oh snap... crackle and pop