Well my baby's liquored up and she's talkin' to my friends
About this and that and nothin' then she starts it all again

Her head's like a powder keg her hair is on the bar
She's lookin' for a sucker she's found another buyer


Swamp breath sudden death she's sittin' at the bar
She's grabbin' every crotch she sees no matter who they are
She's yellin' at the cops she's goin' too far

She just took a %#@! in the back of my car

She's allllllllllll liquored up

Oh yes my baby she's all liquored up
She's allllllllllll liquored up
Oh she's usually a pretty uh nice girl too

She's allllllllllll liquored up

Well she smiles like a reptile and her lips are razor thin

Her legs are like jello but her voice can rip your skin
To hide her ugly face she puts her skirt above her head
The whole Seventh Fleet is checkin' out her spread


Bow mast shot glass stuck to her snout
It's everybodys buisness don't care what it's about

Rum gin anything now it's good and stout
The whole bar is hopin' that she soon passes out


She's allllllllllll liquored up
Oh how'd she get so dang liquored up
She's allllllllllll liquored up

Hey man she was supposed to drive ME home
She's allllllllllll liquored up


She's allllllllllll liquored up
I saw her kneeling in the Saints' locker room
She's allllllllllll liquored up

Hell no I ain't payin' her bar tab!
She's allllllllllll liquored up
Bar's open!