Relatively speaking
Life has been good to me
There's cash flow in my pocket

And the girlies come regularly
I don't like to %#@! in public
Even though the smell doesn't bother me

And the only problem is my friends
A bag called colostomy


I have a colostomy bag
It's underneath my jeans
I get real mad when it starts to sag

Cause then you know there's more to me

I tried to call Miss Lucille Ball

Cause I know she'd give me clemency
But the newspaper said
I love lucy is dead

So it's just me and my colostomy

Woohoo


You gotta pretty mouth boy
Squeal like a (*##$

Squeal like a (*##$ boy