(Intro)

The loss against Tottenham Hotspur...was one of the worst of my career.

Of course, I did not see the game-
But I am told the referee made a lot of mistakes
But since it worked so well for Rafa,

I wanted to tell the fans, the hacks, the internet trolls- this is my story, my press conference, why you looking at me?

When I rap on the track you know it's a medley

All the ladies with me have worse knees than Ledley
Yes I'm the King, I'm the Principal


Mon Dieu! I made the Gunners Invincible!
I remember the old days we used to score for fun
And no one had heard about the Special One.

Keown would cry when I walked in the room.
Thierry Henry said I was his Va Va Voom


Think of my signings- they don't compare:
Pires, Llundberg, Niklas Bendtner.
My Scouts find players in the maternity ward

We sign the contract before they've cut the cord.

I can understand why the fans are fussed

But what happened to In Arsene We Trust?
I sell these players when I please-
Do you want Ashley back in his tighty whities?

We' re better off without them if you ask me
Rather have Franny Jeffers here than Samir Nasri
They always say I only sign the French

Just ask Frimpong- we only sign the DENCH.

Chorus


(Leave Arsene, Leave Arsene, Leave Arsene Wenger Alone)


Please leave me alone.
Haven't I suffered enough?
I miss you Robin. I miss you so much.

Mon petit Flying Dutchman.
Come back to me. Come home.



And do you think I care? That I give a %#@!?
What Piers Morgan writes on his Twit-

Err-no. He should work on his show.
Look daily at his mirror,
And try to get slimmer.


If I only had a team of Gareth Bales!
Our defense has more leeks than the whole of Wales

I tried to sell Gervinho for a fiver
Mertesacker turns slower than a learner driver.


The secret is- I just do what I'm told-
I'm incredibly scared of that nutter Steve Bould
He's always shouting and he's never nice,

Every night in my dreams I long for Pat Rice.

Like the Sugababes, I'm trying to be stronger

But I get more stressed and my coat gets longer.
Seeing Fergie smile, it makes me ill
And someone give Villas-Boas a Strepsil.


Cesc- when can we Skype?
It has been so long since we talked last.

I need to stop the Spurs.
Maybe I will spike another lasagna...I don't know.


Chorus

(Leave Arsene, Leave Arsene, Leave Arsene Wenger Alone)


It's a coat, not a sleeping bag, ok?
It's a coat- not a sleeping bag.

Bradford are a good team!
Theo- stop behaving like a little (*##$.
Please leave me alone.

Why did I sign Chamakh?

Non- that's misinformation.
I'm going to have to keep Wilshere in my ba!@&(t.