LINK-
Life is simple, life is sweet
In my little corner of the forest, Kokiri!

Got no fairy, but I don't care
The only thing that's bothersome are my nightmares of
EVIL GANONDORF

*Gasp* Grass!

DEKU TREE-

Link, thou must take Navi
To begin, ye tale, ye story
Thou will meet thy Princess Destiny


LINK-
Z..Ze...ZELDA!

Just hearing her name and I'd say "Hell Ya!"
I'll save Hyrule and leave my life behind
I'm only 10 and can't control my sex drive

Somewhere she is waiting for me
And I know she'll have my babies


GANONDORF-
I will take Hyrule with ease
To get your Zelda come fight me

*Uh...how do you feel about energy ball tennis?*

LINK-

*Ye...yeah that's fine...*

GANONDORF-

*Good, that's kind of my thing*

LINK-

I will destroy you, and save all these lands

GANONDORF-

Not while the Triforce of Power is on my hand!
It's over Link, you're just a boy
Prepare to d...


LINK-
Shoot an arrow throw a bomb

Oh my god, something's wrong
Out of hearts, out of fairies, I'm going to d...


ZELDA-
Link!
I love you, you know what to do

Travel through time, where I will wait for you
With bigger !@(&, and new shoes
I'll do what you wanna...


MALON-
I love Link too, I will wait for you

What a dumb blonde, red hair's more fun
You can ride on Epona


GANONDORF-
*Uh...do you wanna finish...later?*


LINK-
*Too late!*
Travel through space and time

Screw the timeline

LINK-

Oops!
I didn't see you there
I don't mean to stare

But who in Hyrule are you?

HAPPY MASK SALESMAN-

Come here my child
Hear what I say
Save all our souls please

You have but three days

Masks make us happy
Surely you'll try
Need a good reason

Look at the SKY
We're going to DIE
We've run out of TIME

LINK-

Here we go again
Of course you're gonna time me
Why should I try?

Oh-MY

No-LIE
Good-BYE

MOON-
I shall consume

I shall consume