10, drink some some more eggnog thats
15, have another slice of pie thats
25, go ahead and make it an even 30

hope those scales are sturdy
enough to hold the weight of your !@*#
as you finally made a conclusion

you're not getting laid over for new years
go ahead and have a few more beers
rent some movies on pay-per-view

cause nobody's gonna be near you
as you look at yourself in the mirror
you can almost already hear 'em

laugh and call you tubby