Tosspint rises early
Sprung from a nightmare's claw
Thrice crows the dawn @@#!

The mist is on the moor
Tosspint cries from croaking gills
Thank God I'm not forsaken

From the hellish depths of sleep
At last I am awaken


Tosspint flushed his kidneys
And rained a golden shower
Pleased to piss a good pot full

He shat upon the hour
Tosspint filled his belly
With tripe and ox's tongue

A sucking pig stuffed with figs
Into his guts he flung


Full belly and the dance is merry
Where hunger reigns no strength obtains
The wheel spins, the gurdy hums

Ring the bells and beat the drum

Tosspint drinks lustily

And pees against the sun
All around the hoary oak
The laughing maidens run

Tosspint warms his codpiece
To the flour adds the yeast
In the field by Tanner's Mill

He plays to two-backed beast

Twist the spigot, close the hole

Stoke the fire and blow the coal
The wheel spins, the gurdy hums
Ring the bells and beat the drum

Full belly and the dance is merry
Where hunger reigns no strength obtains
The wheel spins, the gurdy hums

Ring the bells and beat the drum

Tosspint fell foul of dogma

And slipped into schism
The trial was quick, the sky grew dark
They led him from the prison

Tied him to a stake of oak
Lit a fire of wood and !@%!e
The crowd sang out "His bacon's smoked!"

The bells rang out "Tosspint's croaked!"

Tosspint under flaming sky

Walks through the fires of Hell
Where bestial demons threw the damned
Screaming as they fell

Into pits of burning coals
Tosspint throws up his last bowl
And mingled with the soup

His soul

Tosspint rises early

Sprung from a nightmare's claw
Thrice crows the dawn @@#!
The mist is on the moor

Twist the spigot, close the hole
Stoke the fire and blow the coal
The wheel spins, the gurdy hums

Ring the bells and beat the drum