So you've asked for a song, I will sing, I will tell,
It's about a young lady you knew right well,
Her name it was Mary, a wonderful lass,

And the story I'll tell is about Mary's $$#.
Tooralay, tooralay, with me tooraliy, ooraliy, ooraliyay


Now a summons to Mary her uncle did make
She wandered she liked for some exercise to take
So asked for an $$#, she would have her own choice

So she chose a fine $$#, she said "Thank ye in space"
Tooralay, tooralay, with me tooraliy, ooraliy, ooraliyay


One day out a ridin' young Mary did go,
She was off to the neighbours, her $$# for to show,
Her neighbours all laughed and by them she did ask

For they said that she had such a beautiful $$#.
Tooralay, tooralay, with me tooraliy, ooraliy, ooraliyay


After ridin' all day, she returned to her home,
Her $$# was all covered with sweat and with foam,
She went to a bort to get her some grass

And went to the stall just to wipe down her $$#.
Tooralay, tooralay, with me tooraliy, ooraliy, ooraliyay


Now one day after dark down the road she did pass
A boy with a straw just tickled her $$#
The $$# did a bolt down a hole he did go,

And over his head my poor Mary did throw.
Tooralay, tooralay, with me tooraliy, ooraliy, ooraliyay


She was taken back home, recovered next day
But poor old $$#, was all covered with clay
She was carved up the neighbours but he said in doubt

But in fact Mary's $$# was in everyone's mouth.
Tooralay, tooralay, with me tooraliy, ooraliy, ooraliyay


Now Mary regretted her loss of her $$#
And oft by the road every day she goes past,
And one thing I can tell you as there is a story

There's a hell of a smell comes from Mary's $$# hole.
Tooralay, tooralay, with me tooraliy, ooraliy, ooraliyay
Tooralay, tooralay, with me tooraliy, ooraliy, ooraliyay


[ Note The above version may need a little correction
due to the irish accent in transcribing.

Below is the traditional version of the song.]

You've asked for a story, I will sing, I will tell,

About a young lady I knew very well
Her name it was Mary, a beautiful lass,
And the song I will sing, is about Mary's $$#.


A present to Mary her uncle did make
For whenever she wanted to, some exercise take

This donkey or mule? He said, Sure take your choice
One that's gay and so frisky with beautiful voice.


Now early next morning young Mary was out
And all round about town was seen riding about
It was the talk of the town, north, east, west and south

In fact, Mary's $$# was in everyone's mouth.

When tired of this, she would gallop back home

Her $$# would be covered with sweat and with foam
She'd cry out to the groom: "grab a handful of grass
Come down to the stable and wipe down my $$#".


Now Joe who sells greens has a moke very old
It is bony and lean from starvation and cold

And whenever he meets Mary, which often occurs
How he wishes his $$# was as handsome as hers


Now early one morning as Mary did pass
A lad with a straw slyly tickled her $$#
The mule gave a bolt down a hole it did go

And over its shoulder poor Mary did throw

They carried her home, she recovered next day
But her $$# it was left in the hole where it lay
It's poor neck was broken, god bless my soul

And the people all round, called it "Mary's $$# hole".

And Mary regretted the loss of her $$#
And oft time at evening by there she would pass
And lately I've noticed as by there I stroll

That some very bad smells come from "Mary's $$# hole".