ROBIN THICKE lyrics : "Blurred Lines Parody #Contraceptive Lines"
Intro:
Put your sponge in
Put that patch on
Where's your cap at?
Hey hey hey
Hey hey hey
Hey hey hey
Verse 1:
If you must know, I use birth control
If you can't read, I use an IUD
Maybe it's Mirena
Maybe it's Paraguard
Maybe it's long-acting like Skyla
Pre-Chorus:
Ok that sperm was close, trying to penetrate you
IUD like a T, secretly in utero
Or try the Nexplanon
Rod placed in your upper arm
These implants last for 3 years
Chorus:
And that's why we should use protection
Don't wanna get pregnant
Don't want your nasty
Nasty infections
I'll use condoms
STI protection
Latex or lambskin
No need prescriptions
What about abstinence?
No, I don't want it
I know you want it
Don't really want it
But I'm a good girl
Go ahead go tie your tubes
Failure rate less than 1%
Don't think reversal
Verse 2:
Maybe I'll use depo
This shot covers three months
We'll be incognito
My ovaries won't release eggs
I feel so fertile (hey hey hey)
Irregular bleeding (hey hey hey)
What rhymes with bleeding?
Heyyyyyyyyyy
Pre-Chorus:
Ok that sperm was close, trying to penetrate you
IUD like a T, secretly in utero
Or try the Nexplanon
Rod placed in your upper arm
These implants last for 3 years
Chorus:
And that's why we should use protection
Don't wanna get pregnant
Don't want your nasty
Nasty infections
I'll use condoms
STI protection
Latex or lambskin
No need prescriptions
What about abstinence?
No, I don't want it
I know you want it
Don't really want it
But I'm a good girl
Go ahead go tie your tubes
Failure rate less than 1%
Don't think reversal
Verse 3:
One thing I ask of you
Don't let me be the one to remind you
Yo, from Sunset to Central Park
Please be taking your pill right on the mark
You're looking to prevent ovulation
Take it everyday, no aggravation
Ring on, place it inside like a tampon
Easy like saving money with groupon
After 3 weeks the ring comes out
Week 4 comes her rag, girl hiding out
Nothing like the method pull out and pray
Not right now no headache no baby on the way
So I just count...and wait... for the days when you're not fertile
Not many women can refuse this method
Just know your body and the patterns that ended
Bridge:
Spermicide, rub down, rub up
Can you wait for 10?
10 minutes
What you don't like work? (heyyyyy)
Pre-Chorus:
Baby, can't you see. The condom just exploded
We can buy the emergency? Good up to 5 days later (uh huh)
It's not an abortion (hey hey hey)
And now we're winning (hey hey hey)
Here's our beginning (hey hey hey)
Chorus:
I've always wanted a diaphragm
Don't wanna get pregnant
Don't want your nasty
Nasty infections
I'll use condoms
STI protection
Latex or lambskin
No need prescriptions
What about abstinence?
No, I don't want it
I know you want it
Don't really want it
But I'm a good girl
Go ahead go tie your tubes
Failure rate less than 1%
Don't think reversal
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