"Is everybody ready?"
Cried the starter, looking up.
Our hero feebly answered, "Yes,"

And then we stood him up.
He started booming down the trail,
But his bindings were unhooked,

Well, he ain't gonna race no more.
Holy, moly, what a finish!
Holy, moly, what a finish!

Holy, moly, what a finish!
Well, he ain't gonna race no more.
He felt the wind, he felt the cold,

He felt the sudden drop.
He tried to stem, he tried to check,
And then he tried to stop.

A sudden bang, an awful 'CRACK',
As tree and skier met,
And he ain't gonna race no more.

Holy, moly, what a finish!
Holy, moly, what a finish!
Holy, moly, what a finish!

Well, he ain't gonna race no more.