CLUB VEG lyrics : "The Wanker Song (One Week Parody)"


It's been, four weeks since you slept with me,
I was horny both turtlnecked and angry.
One month since you looked at me,
said, come to bed I'm ready
get over here and bang me.

Four weeks since you polished me, parked the pink cadillac and held the sausage hostage.
Too long since your pigskin bus drove
in to tuna town
and lost most of its luggage.

Blue balls I got a back log,
I gotta jack off,
burp the worm and spank the monkey.
I get flustered so I tussle with the love pump the make the slug jump there's a lack o
rump a pumpy.
I yank the doodle, drain the dragon,
I miss the shaggin',
so I sit and cuff the puppy.
Beat the bishop thad the rabbit,
choke the sheriff
or while he's waiting for the posse
Goin' pop the purple pimple
wax the weasel
pound the flounder
stroke the pope
and toss off a batch of orphans.
Gonna flick the stick
or slam the ham
jerk the gerkin
take a shake and break
and then manipulate the mango.

(chorus)
I can't help it I go white water wristing, all
I need's a night of indoor fishing.
I choke the chicken
and I don't know how to thank ya.
Is it any wonder now that I've become a wank-a. I have a tendency to bumpin' Mr. Cyclops,
I have a history of punishing the pope.

It's been four weeks since you've honed the bone so I tenderize my beef
I tussle with my muscle.
Long time since we drove it home,
gotta slap my happy sacks around and do the knuckle shuffle.
One month since our privates talked,
there was a time when we'd grind every night
and it was so fine.
Now I plant the seed and jack the bean stalk
and I dully try to shine
what's mine until I go blind.

Punch the munchkin....bark the shank

Pump the python....yank the crank

Check the dipstick....butter corn

Take a quick trip....around the horn

Shine the cobra....tame the hog

Chokin' Kojak....pet the dog

Ah!


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